Episode Transcript
[00:00:01] Speaker A: Welcome to Flawless Conversations. I'm Tameka Jones, and today we're diving into how mindset can shift your life, your confidence, your purpose.
You're watching now Media Television.
Welcome to Flawless Conversations. I'm your host, Tameka Jones. This show is all about truth, healing, and the powerful stories that shape our purpose. Today we are on a deep dive into what it really means to finally release the story God placed inside of you. Our guest, Dr. V. Blackwell, is a transformational leader, educator, founder of Romero Christian University.
And she is passionate, deeply, deeply, deeply, deeply passionate about equipping people to walk boldly into their calling. And today, she's here to help us unlock the story we've been holding onto for far too long.
Dr. V, thank you for joining us.
[00:01:07] Speaker B: Thank you so much for having me.
[00:01:08] Speaker A: Yes, I'm glad you're here.
Let's step right into this conversation about what happens when your story stays stuck in your heart and how we begin to let it out not as perfection, but as purpose. Dr. V. So many people carry a story that aches to be told, yet fear and doubt in comparison. That comparison trap keeps them silent. Many people often believe their story. Is it good enough, big enough, or perfect enough?
I was one of those people.
This segment helps them and me to understand how to start, how to honor their story, and why it matters. Dr. V. What is the first step someone should take when they know their story matter, but don't know where or how to begin?
[00:02:02] Speaker B: Well, I think the first step is giving yourself permission to speak. You know, let's talk about it. Because your story does. It doesn't begin with perfection.
It begins with honesty. You got to be real, keep it real. Because people want to hear authentic stories.
At the university at Vermont Christian University, we teach our leaders how to do that. Your voice is part of your assignment.
The moment you say, my story deserves space, clarity begins.
[00:02:30] Speaker A: Yes, I like that. I like that. Clarity begins. And then you don't need permission. Right. To stop.
[00:02:36] Speaker B: No. No, you do not.
[00:02:38] Speaker A: Right. Your story is deep rooted inside of you, and your story is your story. Right. My story may be different from yours, your story may be different from mine, but we all have a story.
How. How powerful and empowering is that to. To. To empower someone else through your story, Right?
[00:02:57] Speaker B: Absolutely. I think. I mean, you know, somebody's going to tell your story for you if you don't tell it yourself, right?
Yeah. And I think God allows us to go through things sometimes, you know, so he. We can. He can use our testimony to help others.
[00:03:10] Speaker A: Yes, I totally agree.
So why do people often feel their stories aren't good enough for others to read or hear?
[00:03:19] Speaker B: Because sometimes they. People compare their stories, you know, to other people's stories. They want to change it up. Like, okay, well, you said yours is. Your story's like this and mine is like that. But your story is your story. It has a raw beginning, you know, and you can't compare it to someone else's finished chapter. So what makes your story powerful is not perfection, but it's being authentic, keeping it real, you know, like telling people the truth, the whole raw truth about what happened will help your story, help you to tell your story.
[00:03:50] Speaker A: Absolutely. That. That. That authenticity is what we need most, especially when. When curating your own story, just being yourself. And there was times that I struggle with being my true, authentic self. Right. Where I had to go back and peel back the layers and ask the question, who is Tamika and what. What does she want in life? And what does that look like? Right. Why do I have such fear of not being good enough? Right. Where is this coming from? So a lot of times we have to dig deeper to get to our why. Right? To even write that book.
[00:04:24] Speaker B: Yes, absolutely. I think sometimes it goes back to, like, a childhood trauma or something, you know, something happened to back and when you were a child that will, you know, get you stuck and, you know, just like. So that helps us with the. Put on them layers.
[00:04:40] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:04:40] Speaker B: So trying to find out, you know, true identity and who we are, it's peeling off the layers because it's all up underneath, covered up with a bunch of stuff.
[00:04:48] Speaker A: It is childhood trauma, workplace trauma, relationships that people have been in in the past where their spouse told them they weren't good enough. And your story doesn't matter. Nobody ever listened to you. All the things.
Thanks, Dr. V.
Dr. V. How do you help someone turn their pain or experience into a story that can heal and also inspire?
[00:05:12] Speaker B: Well, as a group coach, you know, because I've been doing group coaching for a while, so I kind of help them separate the womb from the width and turn it into wisdom. You know, look at the. The. The authentic part. To go deep. Dig deep and tell the. Because I guess as grief clients, a lot of them still struggle with anger, denial, bargaining, depression, all kind of stuff. And like I said, just dig deep and, you know, realize when those triggers happen. But. And I want them to write from a healed place, not the hurting place. You see, I'm saying, because when you can help someone to heal, your pain becomes someone else's breakthrough.
[00:05:49] Speaker A: Yes. I Agree with that. Yes, wholeheartedly. Yeah. And writing from a heel heal perspective versus a traumatized perspective.
And that's even. Even our words. We can go back to just the words, right. We want to speak and be. Become her from a healed place in space, not a hurt or traumatized place in space. So that mindset is key. You hit the. The nail right on the head.
Heal, healing, heal.
And also did a book collaboration with you, which we'll talk about a little bit later.
But, Dr. V, you are so amazing. You're doing so many things. So many things. And we'll talk about that later.
What mindset shift can help someone trust that their story has value even before it's polished, Even before you do your magic. Right?
What mindset shift helps someone to trust that their story is valuable even when you do your polishing, your final touches.
[00:06:49] Speaker B: Well, like I said, when you know that your story needs to be told. You see what I'm saying? You gotta just. Like I said, you gotta shift from. When you shift from a place of healing and how. You know, how you feel now since you.
You gotta break through. Right? Because like I said, a lot of times we're going through stuff. We writing it down, we journaling about it, and we know we can turn this into a book to help someone else. And, you know, you just like with. So when you start the process, you start with your little title, you know, then you break it down into chapters and sections, Right? Because a lot of times when we're writing, sometimes you journal, you have different topics, which could actually be chapters in a book. Right?
So when you break it down, I think that helps us to start the mind, to shift our mind mindset and say, hey, this actually, yes, I made it out, but there are a lot of other women or other ladies struggling with the same thing that I was stuck with. So now I need to help someone else other than myself.
[00:07:53] Speaker A: Yes. So that mindset, meaning my goal is to inspire, empower others about me, because that's a form of being selfish. Right. You have a story to help the next woman or the next man or the next family, but you're not sharing them. Right. So that mindset shift, meaning you want to help others and give back and empower others. That's. That's huge. And that's what we need right now in the world. Right? We need more of that.
[00:08:22] Speaker B: Absolutely. Yes, we do.
[00:08:26] Speaker A: We definitely need more of that. What's a affirmation could encourage someone who believes my story matters and deserves to be told.
[00:08:34] Speaker B: Like I said. Yep. That is the good one right there. That my story matters. It does. It absolutely matters. You know, and like I said, if you don't tell it, one day somebody's gonna stand up there and tell your story for you. Right?
[00:08:45] Speaker A: Absolutely.
[00:08:46] Speaker B: Because that obituary is like, it's your story, your life. Right.
So know that it matters, and it definitely.
You deserve to tell it. And I know when I once I start writing books, I think that's a part of that. Our gifts will make room for us.
[00:09:02] Speaker A: Oh, can you say that again?
[00:09:04] Speaker B: Yeah. Our gifts will make room for us. And I think that's when you start to really can identify because you start digging deep, like, what are my gifts? What are my strengths? What are my weaknesses? You know, all of that comes out when you start writing.
You know, you start to release a lot of stuff and you, like, can figure out why you were stuck, like, oh, so that it went all the way back to something a kindergarten teacher said or second grade, you know, coach.
Right. So, yeah, but like I said, they.
They have changed my life. They really have.
[00:09:36] Speaker A: Yes. That purpose. Right. I am worthy. I am the author of my story. Yes. Beautiful affirmation. Write that down, everybody. I am the author of my story. I hold a pen to my. Yes, yes, absolutely. So coming up next, what do you do when the blank pages feel like a mirror reflecting back all your doubts and fears and how you write it anyway, Right. How can you write it anyway?
[00:10:03] Speaker B: Right.
[00:10:04] Speaker A: So stay with us. We'll be right back.
We'll be right back. To remind you that healing is possible, confidence is yours, and that you are flawless.
This is Flawless Conversations on NOW Media Television.
And we're back. I'm Tameka Jones, and you're watching Flawless Conversations on NOW Media Television. Are you ready? Let's go.
Welcome. Welcome back to Flawless Conversations.
Want more of what you're watching? Stay connected to this show and every NOW Media TV show. Live or on demand, anytime, anywhere. Download the free Now Media TV app on Roku or iOS and enjoy non stop bilingual programming on the move. Catch this podcast version anytime at www.nowmedia.tv.
from lifestyle and leadership to faith and personal growth, Now Media TV is here for you 24 7.
Welcome back to Flawless Conversations. We're here with Dr. V.
Diving into the writing journey, specifically the overwhelm that happens when starting on a blank canvas.
Many viewers and listeners may feel called to write, but freeze when it's time to start.
Let's unpack how to move from procrastination to progress once again. Many people want to write, but the Fear of failure, perfectionism and not knowing the right way stops them. And this was me. So I'm talking to myself too in this segment. It gives the viewers and myself and listeners the structure, confidence and small steps to start building momentum.
Dr. V, what do you recommend to someone who wants to write Fulfills the blank pages is too intimidating.
[00:12:13] Speaker B: They don't know where to start.
Start small, like one sentence at a time, one moment, one memory. It all starts from a blank page.
It isn't a wall. So don't go stop at that, you know, run into the wall. Say it's a doorway, it's an open doorway.
So look inside, you know, start. Like I said, one little paragraph, one sentence turns into a paragraph, a paragraph turns into a chapter, chapter turns into a book, you know, so don't think you have to write, have to have 500 pages in the book. It doesn't have to be. You can start small, you know, it can read 10 chapters, 12 chapters, and then leave something for the next book. Because people will always ask, hey, when is your next book coming out?
So don't try to deliver everything in one book.
[00:13:04] Speaker A: When I started, you know, I started my journey with Flawless.
All things flawless, right? My definition of flawless is, is confidence, resilience and self love. And when I started writing my books, the two books that I've written is Cultivating youg Garden of Self Love and then Writing the Ways to Self confidence. I started Dr. B because I wanted each book to represent Flawless. I still haven't written the Resilience piece. That's the one about my military journey.
That's going to take a while because I have to unpack a lot, right? The good, bad and ugly.
But like you said, baby steps. When I first started, the first one was Riding the Ways of Self Confidence, right? All the things that I struggle with right along my journey. So like you said, I had to take baby steps, right? And some of the stuff is raw, right? It's from childhood trauma, it's from the military, it's from my, my young adulthood years. But once again pouring back and giving that back to others and sharing my story and empowering others. And in my book there's nuggets, right? Take away nuggets at the end of it because I want women to take, take something from, from like learn life lessons, right from as well. So that was my first book and, and it wasn't, it wasn't my best book, needless to say, but I put it out there, right? And sometimes we are our worst critics and you know, so much about that. Right.
Especially with writing, you see people, they're. You know, they think that they don't have a masterpiece when they bring it to you, and they do, because it's their story, their journey, and their walk. Right, Right.
So, yeah, that.
Words turn into a paragraph, paragraph turn into a chapter, chapter turn into a book. And also, not even a book. Dr. V, they can. May consider writing a journal, right?
You have journals. You have.
Right?
[00:15:05] Speaker B: I do, yep. And because you can do devotionals and affirmations for journals, they. And they help. They help people to heal. Most of my books, the anthologies are devotionals and.
And we write for one day. So you have short pieces. It doesn't have to be a lot. Some people just need something to get through the day.
[00:15:23] Speaker A: Yes. And the anthology that we just did a while back, Rising through the Pain.
How many men and women was in that anthology?
[00:15:32] Speaker B: 90.
[00:15:33] Speaker A: 90 of us. Oh, it's so powerful. Rising through the Pain. It's on Amazon, and I think it's on Dr. V's website as well, which she'll give out later. But Rising through the Pain was powerful. Tell us a little bit the them of that.
[00:15:49] Speaker B: So Rising through the Pain. So, like I said, I'm a Joy Grief and Joy Restoration coach. So all of my books service that community.
When I first started out writing, I lost all my siblings, So I had three sisters and a brother. They all passed away, and I was serving in the military. I was like, okay, trying to figure out my exit plan. My youngest sister was the last to pass. She passed in 2014.
And I had gotten Grief Coach. I had gotten Life Christian Spiritual Salt, Life Certified and Grief and Joy Restoration. And after she passed, God brought me back to my certification and said that was my calling.
[00:16:28] Speaker A: Powerful.
[00:16:29] Speaker B: So I was like, wow, okay. So that's why I'm here to, you know, help people heal from grief and loss. And so I started writing about doing collaborations first because I really didn't know how to write a whole book. So I was in a couple of collaborations before I started doing mine. Probably about seven different collaborations.
And then I published my first book. It was the Grief Helpline. So the Grief Helpline was a devotional first half is Grief Recovery, and the second half is Joy Restoration.
So I broke it up into like, that. So it was a 50 days of grief recovery, and then the second part is Joy Restoration, so that I turned into a package when Covet hit. I actually created a grief kit because I couldn't do just one on ones. It was just the world was grieving and everybody was calling and I was about to pull my hair out over here, so I said I worked on a grief kit. So it's a.
It's the devotional, a journal, coloring book, and a planner. Because a lot of times people can't concentrate and they don't remember dates. So the coloring helps them with the therapeutic for healing, and the. The planner helps them to keep their dates and stuff intact.
So those are. I mean, just some of the books that you can do. But yeah, whether your audience or is kids, teenagers, adults, men or women. Because a lot of people read books.
[00:17:57] Speaker A: Yeah, absolutely. So basically find out what it is, your what. What you want to do, what your purpose is and what your gift is. Like Dr. V said. And it's kids. There you go. You have coloring books, right?
You have books. Planners. Everybody love planners. I need a planner. So Dr. B, I'll be talking to you afterwards because I need a. My mom needs a planner, right. She always miss her appointments. So, you know, whatever it is you want to do, whatever. Whatever it is, pick up that pen, right, and start writing it out. Make it clear as day.
And if it is a book, then start writing it. If it's a journal, if it's a planner, if it's a self, Self help is. If it's an auto. Whatever it is, autobiography, start.
[00:18:37] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:18:39] Speaker A: Okay. Take the first step before this new year, this 2026 roll around and it'll be here before you know it, right?
[00:18:45] Speaker B: Yes, absolutely. Right around the corner.
[00:18:48] Speaker A: Yes.
Dr. V. How do you encourage someone to stay committed when progress feels painfully slow?
I know really quick. When I started writing my chapter in the anthology Rising through the Pain, I talked about my loss and how me losing a child, how difficult that was.
But turned around and I made it into something positive, something someone can take away from reading my chapter in that devotional.
So even when the pain, there is pain.
How do you encourage someone to stick and stay committed to the process and the progress that they're making?
[00:19:31] Speaker B: Well, when I was writing, and I always tell my clients to do a weekly rhythm of reflection, you know, so that way, because, you know, sometimes, you know, you get stuck. You know, it's like, oh, I can't just put it down. So you put it down, but pick it back up the next week so you can start journaling. I mean, you can record your. Your notes, voice notes help.
A lot of quiet time when you're reading. When you're writing, you need a lot of quiet time to. To get the clarity, to be able to release it. To the paper, you know, from the, to the pen to the paper.
Quiet. Being quiet and still helps these practices keep your message flowing, you know, and that helps you to release it. Even sometimes, you know, when the motivation fades, you'll be like, I'm tired. Right. But if you stick to, you know, being committed to doing it weekly, going back to it and continue to reflect on it and, you know, write it down, create your little voice notes, you can get your book out there.
Yes.
[00:20:35] Speaker A: Basically, what he's saying is from the heart, mind. From the mind to the paper.
[00:20:40] Speaker B: Right?
[00:20:41] Speaker A: Y powerful Dr. B. Where can our audience connect with your writing programs, your coaching and resources?
[00:20:51] Speaker B: My my website is for the coaching is www.lifeuimagine for the school, we have the university, Romero Christian University. And they can find my books and, you know, the information for the school at www.vomerochristianuniversity.com.
[00:21:17] Speaker A: Okay, so both of those and, and, and you tell us a little bit about the school. We have, we have a minute or so left. Tell us a little bit about Romero University.
[00:21:26] Speaker B: So I launched my school in the spring, but someone found me on social media and they nominated me a couple of years ago to get my honorary doctorate. And at the time I was working on a collaboration and I asked them if I could share the opportunity with some of my co authors and she said, yeah. So from that opportunity, I nominated over 50 people to get their honorary doctorates.
So I love the honorary doctorate program because it truly opened the door for me this spring. They came out and they said, hey, we're going to teach a few people how to launch a school. And I was like, wow, that may be my next, you know, because I had a good, such a good success rate with nominating candidates for, for my product, for our program.
So I started the school. My grandson is the president and I'm the founder, 66 years old. So I created, created for Mary University to create a legacy for my family. And we're going to rock it because it has the honorary doctorate as well as we have 33 different programs over there. So you get bachelor's, I mean associates, bachelor's, masters, as well as a doctorate. But I love the honorary doctorate portion. Y so amazing.
[00:22:40] Speaker A: You're building legacy. I love it. Impact. I love it. VC See you.
We'll talk more about that.
[00:22:48] Speaker B: Okay, next segment.
[00:22:50] Speaker A: So up next, why imposter syndrome tries to silence you, even the strongest voices and how to rise. Anyway, stay tuned. Of more flawless conversations.
We'll be right back to remind you that healing is possible.
Confidence is yours and that you are flawless.
This is Flawless Conversations on NOW Media Television.
And we're back. I'm Tameka Jones and you're watching Flawless Conversations on NOW Media Television. Are you ready? Let's go.
Welcome, welcome back to Flawless Conversations.
In this segment, we're talking about something every leader, writer or creator battles with.
That's imposter syndrome.
Even the most talented people feel unqualified when stepping into their voice.
Today, Dr. V helps us separate truth from fear.
Many of the viewers and also listeners feel unworthy, inexperienced, or that not good enough, even when they're gifted and they're truly, truly qualified.
This segment breaks down. How to silence the inner critic, embrace authenticity and lead from heart, not through insecurities or fear.
Dr. V, why do some of the most experienced people still feel like imposter, still feel like imposters even when they try to write and rewrite and write again or even lead?
[00:24:34] Speaker B: Because stepping into a new level, it exposes old doubts. You know, it brings up things like, am I good enough? And you know, can I really do this right? Because this fear of facing it right. But even strong leaders struggle when they transition into something new.
First of all, it's new and the, they're getting rid of the old and stepping into something new. We always, you know, face their fear. But authority comes from being authentic, being, keeping it real. And it doesn't always come from credentials. You know, a lot of people say, you know, because when they say the doctor, like with the honorary doctorate, a lot of people don't feel like the honorary doctor is legit, but it is, you know, you don't have to go back to school and spend, have all the student loan debt for the rest of your life for real, you know, so being authentic will help you to heal from that imposter syndrome.
[00:25:31] Speaker A: Absolutely.
Because many of us do feel we want to step out and do these things. But once again, that fear, right, Creeps in. And then we feel like, oh, I'm not good enough to write a book. Or once again, book isn't better than Dr. V's. Or, you know, we. That comparison trap, right? We get caught up in that.
So one thing that I learned to do is take a step back and once again say, my journey is my journey. My gifts are my gifts. My talents are my talents. My purpose is my divine purpose. Not Dr. B's, not, you know, my friends, not my mom's, but Tamika's, right? So sometimes we have to take a step back, right? And self reflect and, and become Self aware of who we are in, in places and spaces.
So that imposter syndrome is something else.
And it creeps in, right? It's like little guards, right? And they don't move until you move it. And I always think of the guards at Buckingham palace, right? You know, they don't move until the Queen says move, right? They stand right there and they're sneaky. You'll never know they're there. So when I think of that, I think of imposter syndrome. I think of fears, I think of doubts, I think of all these things that just, that shows up in our lives.
But we have to, we have to remove them. We have to step aside. This no longer serves me right.
So Dr. B, how do you help someone see that impact is always about? Once again, you mentioned it early. Credentials, heart and authenticity by showing them that impact.
[00:27:06] Speaker B: It doesn't require perfection. I mean, it requires connections. You have to connect with your audience.
Someone. Because someone is out there waiting for your story. Someone is. Needs to hear your voice.
So like I said, and books will do it. So get started journaling, writing. Put your story out there. And like I said, you will be able to reach your target audience with it.
[00:27:31] Speaker A: And once again, that's creating that legacy, right? Because you'll be long gone. And guess what? Guess what still lives.
[00:27:38] Speaker B: Yes, yes. They're still out there. Yeah.
[00:27:40] Speaker A: The words, your words will still remain when you're long, long gone. So that's powerful enough.
That's powerful enough.
What practices help quiet that inner critic when it starts to whisper.
[00:27:55] Speaker B: Community support.
Yes, People.
People who reflect back on the truth of who you are.
It helps, you know, like I said with the school, that's one of the greatest things we offer, you know, in our university, is keep it real, tell the truth. Who, who are you? Because your message is your message and we are all different. None of us are the same. You know, twins, right? They got the different, different fingerprints. They may look like they, you know, the same, but they are different. Right? So share your message with the world. You know, your story is good enough. And like I said, each book you'll improve. Like, oh, none of us start out with the best book in the beginning. It's a learning process, right? Just put it out there, you know. Then you say, hey, well, that wasn't my best work, but that was the beginning. That was the start. So you fall, fail forward, face the fear of actually becoming an author and the journey begins, you know?
[00:28:50] Speaker A: Yes, yes, so true. And I get better and better.
[00:28:54] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:28:54] Speaker A: And you mentioned that to all the authors too, is you have to start small and start somewhere and then your story matters. Right? And what practices help me to quiet that inner critic? Kind of like you when it whispers, who are you to say that or to do that? Right? I go internally and I start affirming. I'm the affirmation queen. Dr. V. Listen, I'm always affirming, Tamika, right? And I, I didn't, I wasn't here. I, I just got here. I haven't always been at this place in space where I'm at now, and I'm a bit quiet. You, you know, a lot of people, you know, like, oh, that's just Tamika. But once you get to know me.
[00:29:32] Speaker B: You know, okay, she, she got a.
[00:29:34] Speaker A: Little fire and she, she's good, right? But just, just walking in and becoming her. Every day I wake up, you know, I say my affirmations, I give gratitude. I have affirmations on my mirror, becoming her. And what does that look like? And I go into my imagination daily and imagine how, how, how I feel becoming her. You know, whatever, whether it's, whether it's writing the next book, Flawless Conversations, how I want to show up there.
I practice every day how I want to show up, becoming her. Because every day I'm a step closer to becoming her. Right?
[00:30:08] Speaker B: Absolutely. I love that.
[00:30:10] Speaker A: Yes, yes. So how can self love and self trust become the foundation of believing in your own message?
[00:30:18] Speaker B: Dr. V.
So self love. So you gotta know that, you know, first of all, self love and self care is so important.
You know, a lot of times we go, especially as women, we take care of everybody else other than ourselves, right? And then it feels like it's wrong to take care of you. I need my nails done, but I can't wait, you know? No, go get your nails done. Take care of you. Because you can't pour from an empty cup. We have to, we pour so much out, we have to get filled back up. So whether it's getting your nails done, your hair done, whatever, that cute little dress or that you want a bag that you wanted, you are worth that.
[00:30:57] Speaker A: Absolutely. Yeah, definitely.
You know, always to, to, to, to, to. To care for ourselves, you know, and then we have to also dig a little deeper too and do internal self reflection. And so, yes, along with that. Right. But yeah, definitely. Take the trip.
[00:31:14] Speaker B: Yeah. You know, it's worth it.
[00:31:16] Speaker A: Yeah. Do it, do it, do it.
I just bought my daughter puppy. She. And it's funny because she will pray every day about this puppy. And she started praying out loud at Night here in my room. Right?
And that's the only thing she want, that she don't want any. Anything. That's all she want is a puppy. So I just bought this puppy yesterday, and I'm like, what did I do? Right? What did I do? But for her, her prayers was answered. And me just looking out on. Looking from the outside in, I'm like, I just, you know, bless her. Right. God just blessed her through me.
[00:31:56] Speaker B: Right.
[00:31:57] Speaker A: Vessel. Right. But that's all she wanted. All she wanted. So she had the puppy, and she's trying to clean up the pee and pool, and she's smearing it everywhere, and I'm just like, lord, please.
Yeah, but. But. But it's helping her, right? Because she's right. She either wanted a sibling or a puppy. I said, no siblings. We're not going there. So.
[00:32:18] Speaker B: So puppy it is.
[00:32:19] Speaker A: All right.
[00:32:21] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:32:23] Speaker A: But I just wanted to share that story, Right?
[00:32:25] Speaker B: Yeah. It'll get easier because she'll learn how, you know, Just got to show her a couple of times because kids that they learn easy nowadays. So this show, no, you got to pick it up like this, you know, a scoop or get a scooper. You see what I'm saying? And if it's sweet, you got to wet it and then step on, you know, to get it all up off the floor and then get it up, you know, but that. Yeah, and it'll help her, you know, ask. And they help you, too, because you'll be able to get out there and walk with her, you know, so get a little exercise in and get grounded. So that's good. Good stuff.
[00:32:52] Speaker A: He's having a ball. She didn't want to go to school today. I'm like, no, you got to go to school. That's what we do.
Okay, back to the top. And I'm sorry. I don't know why I shared that, but I just had to share it with you all. So we'll see. We'll see how it goes. Dr. B.
What? Affirmation empowers people to start believing I am qualified because I am real and I care.
[00:33:14] Speaker B: Yeah. So for.
Like I said, books qualify you. Books will get you in rooms that you normally couldn't get in. And when you start writing your books, you'll learn. It'll break you down because, like I said, it's going to dig deep and, you know, release some of the distress, the. The traumas and stuff that you had and give you some breakthroughs. So it helps you to, you know, to be real.
You see what I'm Saying therapeutic, right? And it releases some of that, you know, because we have a lot of pent up emotions and all this stuff, you know, still identity crisis from being retired or age or divorced or whatever. You know, you go through so many different identities. You're trying to figure out who am I with all this stuff that layers this falling off or caked up on me. I need to get rid of this so I can get to the real me.
And so it helps just. You are qualified.
Definitely. We're all real. So hey, and I can. And we do care, you know that the. We need to show that more now because the world is so much division out here, right? Yeah. And they teaching us and the kids that. So we gonna have to, you know, it always comes back home because when your child comes home with what they learned at school. School, then it's in the house, you know, so you got to pray and keep up out of date. Keep the enemy out the house, right? But it's. It's a lot, you know what I'm saying?
[00:34:39] Speaker A: It is.
You're so, you're so true. It's. Everything you're saying is spot on, right?
Affirmation. I think I said it. I am qualified because I am and I do care about the world and I am authentic, right.
[00:34:54] Speaker B: A lot of times we're here, we live in it, we got, we're part of it, you know. So what is your. What are you. You know, it's all. It's so important about the dash, right. We know we was born and we gonna have to leave here at some point. But that little dash, what did you do in between?
You see what I'm saying? God brought us here for something. He, we were sent here. We didn't ask to come. You didn't raise your hand, say hey, can I go? You know, I'll go, right? But now we say we'll go. We'll go because we'll work for the kingdom, right? So I work for God now. Whatever he, wherever he leads me, whatever door he opens, that's where we go now. But we were sent here so to do, you know, some great things. So yeah, this is the beginning. And it's always going to be a bit beginning and somewhere in the middle you start to a bit to identify it, right? It starts coming together like these little pieces that was missing. Something was missing from my puzzle. And then you'll get the little pieces because when we start in business, we be all over the place. I want to do this, I want to do that, I want to do that I want to do. Just grabbing everything, right? But then it starts to make sense. This when you settle down, right? Oh, so now I can have the magazine. Oh, so now I can, you know. Yes, we can add that part too. We can have the TV show. All of it comes into play.
[00:36:06] Speaker A: That divine inspo. Right. Nuggets. Like you said, everything starts to map and. And pieces start to come together. You don't see it going through it. Right.
It makes sense. When you take a step back and you look at the bigger, bigger puzzle, you're like, oh, that's why.
[00:36:21] Speaker B: Exactly.
[00:36:22] Speaker A: Even with us, right. When we retired, I got separated from the military, right? That identity. You talking about identity.
To find out, you know, find. Find ourselves, right? Who, who, who. Who is Dr. V? Who is Tamika without all these titles? And I'm this. I'm an officer, I'm a nurse. All these, all these accolades and titles and that society put on us. But who are we at the court and what do we want?
[00:36:45] Speaker B: Right? Purposes. Yes.
[00:36:47] Speaker A: So that's some, Some of the things I struggle with once I separate the military. I don't know if you struggle with that as well, but that, that was a huge, huge, huge for me because I wasn't part of a bigger purpose, a bigger mission anymore.
[00:37:00] Speaker B: Right. Same. Same here. And especially when you retire and you're still young, you know, you want to do something, but, you know, you're not really quite sure because they, A lot of times they point you in the right. In a direction to go back and start being a contractor. Right? So what you're going to be working with, with the same folks you were working with before you left, they just took the uniform off and I said, no, I don't want to do that.
[00:37:22] Speaker A: Right, right. Yeah.
[00:37:25] Speaker B: Let me make up. Let me figure out this thing so I can start my own business, right? Because I was an entrepreneur and I was selling everything.
Liz Sophia, Tupperware Sancy. I did it all. I like the networking space, right? But my younger sister passed away and my niece said she didn't want none of that stuff.
And I was like, we went in there, we did. She just wanted the pictures. Girl, that just threw me through the loop, right? So I sit down and I said, my kids gonna have to do the same thing one day.
I said, well, you know what? I'm change the game because I'm gonna start doing books. They're not gonna want to throw my books away. You see what I'm saying?
So I started, you know, I stopped all that Scentsy Tupperware Mary K. Because they already established their business, right?
[00:38:09] Speaker A: Absolutely.
[00:38:10] Speaker B: We got to put something in the ground for us, for our. You know, our parents worked really hard. My grandparents worked hard. So, like you starting your business for your daughter, right? Yes. This is what we have to do because you can set up trust and all the LLCs and 501C3s. All of that we need to do. Check those blocks now.
[00:38:29] Speaker A: Yeah, absolutely. I so agree. And we talk about our purpose and passion. And I know when I got out of military, I started my women's empowerment apparel.
Flawless fashion code, but it was Based on fear, Dr. V. Fear of me.
[00:38:44] Speaker B: Public.
[00:38:44] Speaker A: I didn't. I fear public speaking. I didn't want to be the center of attention.
So I, I started. I'm like, I can tell my story through my apparel. Right. And a year later, God said, that's not where I called you, Tamika. So let's rewind. Right. Let's play that again. Right. So it's coaching, it's writing books. It's empowering people.
[00:39:02] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:39:03] Speaker A: My apparel was a. Was a funnel to get to where I needed to be. But that's not where my ultimate.
Where I should stop.
[00:39:13] Speaker B: Right, Right.
[00:39:14] Speaker A: So here I am on a talk show talking, Right?
[00:39:17] Speaker B: Absolutely.
[00:39:18] Speaker A: Facing my. One of my worst fears, which is not a fear anymore because I'm doing it right. I don't call it a fear. It's, it's. It's just what it is. I'm speaking.
Right.
[00:39:29] Speaker B: Absolutely. And it will open up so many doors to me because just like you're speaking here, even though you're not, you don't have an audience right here, you know. Well, you do have an audience online. Right. But I'm saying you walk in the room with the same, you know, mindset. You look at the back of the room, you know, look always to the back of the room. You don't have to look directly in nobody's face. Every now and then, you'll catch someone, you know, ass or whatever. But get up there and sell your products and sell your books. I invite people to be on your show because it's going to open up so many doors.
[00:39:59] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:39:59] Speaker B: I mean, it could be awards, your own conferences, retreats, workshops. It is so much bigger than just us, you know, and that's what you have to get out there and share in the world. And I know you said you wanted to start to doing collaborations. You have a great platform for that. So you just need to.
Yeah. Put it out there and start recruiting people to be on in the Collaboration. That's.
[00:40:25] Speaker A: Yeah, that's one thing I said I wanted to get with you. I think I hit you up the other day, was saying I would love it, anybody would love to do, have their own anthology, come up with a theme and have.
My goal is to start small, maybe 10, 20 women, probably not, not as many, but 10 or 20 inspiring authors to start. Give them the voice. Right. So they can put their thoughts to paper and have their own book. Right. Which may become a best sell. Not maybe come, but will become a bestseller.
[00:40:53] Speaker B: Exactly. Yeah.
[00:40:54] Speaker A: So, yeah, definitely gonna collaborate with you on that and pick your brain in regards to that.
So coming up next, how to turn your message into movement.
Not just a manuscript, but once again, how to turn your message into movement. And not just on paper. Don't go anywhere. Stay tuned. More Flawless Conversations.
We'll be right back to remind you that healing is possible.
Confidence is yours, and that you are flawless.
This is Flawless Conversations on NOW Media Television.
And we're back. I'm Tameka Jones and you're watching Flawless Conversations on NOW Media Television. Are you ready? Let's go.
Welcome, welcome back to Flawless Conversations. Don't miss an episode of this show or anything. Any of your favorite Now Media TV shows anytime, anywhere on Now Media TV app on Roku or iOS preferred podcasts. Listen online at www.nowmedia tv.
With 247 bilingual programming, Now Media TV brings stories, insights and inspiration right to you.
We're back with Dr. V for our final segment where inspiration meets action.
This is where a story becomes a movement, a book becomes impact, and a message becomes your ministry. Let's talk about turning personal truth into public transformation.
Many of the listeners and viewers here need clarity on how to move through writing thoughts to building influence, community and real world change. This segment gives them strategy, confidence and direction.
Dr. V, what is the first thing someone should consider when planning their book? To make sure it impacts people and not just sit on the shelf.
[00:43:04] Speaker B: Write with intention.
Know your audience, know who you're speaking to and what do you want them to walk away with?
[00:43:14] Speaker A: I love it.
[00:43:15] Speaker B: Yes. Purpose should be behind every page.
[00:43:19] Speaker A: I, I so love that. And I think a lot of times we lose focus, the momentum, authors or writers, because we want to help everybody, right? We want to help and do everything but once, like you said, stick with your niece, niche, stick with your audience. Right?
And that's kind of what, what I've been doing too. And that's what you, you also teach as well. Know your audience, know your niche and kind of and go full throttle. With that. Because a lot of times we're all over the place and, and, but we're not, you know, directing our attention to, to our niche and our target, target audience. We're all over the place. Right? So I love it. I love that. I love it.
How do you help authors think beyond the writing into strategy, connection, and reach?
[00:44:09] Speaker B: I teach them that the book is a seed. It's not the entire harvest.
Your story can grow into a movement like we were speaking about, a program.
It can be a ministry, but it's something larger than you.
[00:44:25] Speaker A: I love it. I love it. And this, this, this question here is a big one too. So what mistakes do you often see with new authors?
What, what? The mistakes that they make when trying to market their message or their book the wrong way.
[00:44:42] Speaker B: A lot of authors try to market the product instead of nurturing the people.
You have to nurture your audience. That's why I said know who your book is for.
Impact comes from connection.
If you're connecting with your reader, reader, your audience, you don't have to really focus so hard on promotion, but because it will come when you're connecting with the right people, then you can know who to market to.
[00:45:08] Speaker A: Awesome. Awesome. And really quick. Dr. V, on Flawless conversations, we have a flawless nugget and a flawless fact. Can you give us a flawless nugget, something the audience, the viewers, the listeners can take away from this, this show here and put in their back pocket or potentially help someone else to grow?
[00:45:25] Speaker B: Sure. If you're listening today, I want you to know this. Your story is not small, your voice is not accidental, and your message is not meant to sit inside of you.
Someone is waiting for your message and what you carry. So start with what you have, start where you are and trust that your message will help the right audience.
[00:45:52] Speaker A: I love that. I love that. And give us a fact about Dr.
[00:45:55] Speaker B: V.
Dr. V, if you feel well for me, like I said, I'll be. I'm going to continue this mission that God has me on. I'm inspiring others, helping others to get their honorary doctorate Christian universities. The door is wide open.
I'm going to do retreats because I want to inspire my candidates and doctors to, you know, keep pressing. Yes, you got to go all in. You know, invest in yourself is the best investment that you, that you can ever make. Because you know what the, the sweat and the tears that it put in for the work and you know what you expect to get out of it. Right? Continue to plant seeds and let's do, do what we came to do what God put us here to do.
[00:46:35] Speaker A: Okay, well, this fact. Love it, love it, love it. Dr. B. This has been very powerful. Working people. Follow your work, join your programs, and learn more about your leadership resources. How to write a Book, where to start?
[00:46:49] Speaker B: All the things I am Dr. V on Facebook, so you can find me there. My website for the university is www.vermero v e r m a r o christianuniversity.com and I hope you all look me up and I'll send you a link where you can chat with me and we can get you started. Whether it's books, the honorary doctorate, or coaching programs, I'm here to serve.
[00:47:12] Speaker A: Yes, and you do that very well.
[00:47:15] Speaker B: Thank you so much for having me.
[00:47:17] Speaker A: Thank you, Dr. B. For reminding us that our stories are sacred, our words are worthy, and our voices are needed. Today we learned that writing is not just about these pages, not just about the pages. It's about healing, purpose, and impact for everyone who's watching. Remember, the story God placed in you is meant to move through you.
Take the next small steps, trust your voice and keep showing up and showing up every time. This is flawless conversations. I'm your host, Tameka Jones. Until next time, stay bold, stay authentic, and stay flawless.
